Asian Basketball Showdown

Today is the day.

I stroll down the street of the townhouse complex wearing my best pair of sneakers and bouncing the very basketball that will seal the deal of my impending victory. Neighboring residents look on as I make my way into the complex’s basketball court. It’s only half a court, but that’s all we need.

On one side of the court stands my Vietnamese competitor Huynh who holds his own ball. Next to him are two older Asian men who are both wearing suits; I take it these are his father and uncle who have come to give him much needed moral support. On my side of the court sit three of my mates drinking beers from an esky cooler that they’ve dragged from my townhouse garage. The alcohol fueled boisterousness of my rowdy bros will surely intimidate Huynh and his Asian family, giving me an extra edge in the competition. Last of all, near the front centre of the court stands the very prize of the showdown; Huynh’s delicious, virgin teenage sister, Trinh. After I beat Huynh and win the game, this girl is going to be sucking on my balls for dessert tonight!

This whole competition started exactly one month ago. The boys and I had spent the entire day drinking beers and cooking snags on my townhouse veranda. It was the afternoon and we decided it’d be awesome to do some laps around the complex in my mates V8 while cranking some Metallica. During the laps I noticed a bunch of Asians moving furniture around one of the townhouses and another pair near the basketball court. My mates and I decided to jump out of the car and see what all the fuss was about.

That’s when I first saw Trinh, the pretty Asian daughter of the family. My mates all knew how badly I wanted to nail a hot Asian chick and Trinh would be perfect. I noticed she was watching her brother Huynh shooting hoops on the basketball court and I decided to stumble over to them with beer in hand. Huynh immediately stopped shooting on my arrival and both he and his sister greeted me kindly. In my completely shitfaced state, I challenged Huynh to a basketball shootout and if I won I would get to fuck his teenage sister. Huynh explained that his sister was still only a virgin and that he would like at least one month to prepare for the basketball showdown. We shook hands in agreement before I downed the last of my beer. I threw Trinh a sly wink and wandered back over to tell the boys how this shit will go down. In one month’s time Huynh and I would take turns at shooting hoops until he misses and then I would get to take his sister’s sweet virginity.

The following weeks I spent all of my time thinking about how I’m going to plow the fuck out of this girl. Although she’s a virgin I had no plan on being gentle; I wanted her to scream and cry like the Asian girls do in porn. I gave up masturbation for the month and adopted a special diet in order to maximize my sperm count. This would fuel me with an intense sex drive that I would use to ravage her harder, boosted testosterone to win the game and an enormous load of cum to unleash all over her cute little face. I spent days watching Asian porn and planning all of the different ways I could defile this girl for when the time finally came.

I almost feel sympathetic for Huynh and his family. They’ve probably just escaped the horrible living conditions of some war stricken Vietnamese slums. Huynh probably had to fight tooth and nail everyday to protect his sister from being raped by thieves and murderers. Their family may feel safer in our great country but their daughter isn’t safe from me and I’m sure Huynh knows it. I’ve seen the way Trinh admires her older brother and when he loses to me and lets her down it’s going to be sweet… sweet like her lips, sucking on my balls for dessert.

So here I stand beside the half court, today is the day. I watch Huynh prepare to take his first shot and my drunken bros behind me start throwing out a mixture of laughter, racial slurs and the word “cunt”. To my surprise, Huynh lines up the shot carefully and launches the ball straight through the hoop. His father and uncle both nod approvingly and his sister Trinh jumps around happily while doing a bunch of cute little Asian gestures… my fucking god I’m going to slay her. My mates notify Huynh that his shot was “fucking bullshit cunt” and that he should “get fucked ya dirty chink”. Cheers lads.

It’s my turn now and I walk into the centre of the court to take my position. As I line up the ball I notice Trinh in the corner of my eye. She’s holding her innocent little hands tightly over the front of her skirt. She knows that her delicious oriental hymen is now in great danger, along with her precious virginity. Before I crouch down to execute my shot I realise something. I’ve been so obsessed with the idea of fucking Trihn that I haven’t practiced any basketball shots for the entire fucking month!

I take the shot. The ball completely misses. Fuck.

Oh well, shit happens. I decide I’ll just shrug it off and join my bros for some beers to drown my sorrows. As I attempt to walk off Huynh stands in front of me with his arms folded and speaks to me in a serious tone, “You remember our deal right?” I look at him slightly puzzled and reply, “Yeah… If I won I would’ve got to fuck your sister and since I lose I simply don’t… right?”

Huynh shakes his head slowly.

Apparently there was more to the deal than I remember. I was simply too drunk at the time to recall it and I only remembered the awesome part about fucking his sister if I win the basketball showdown. Huynh explains to me that his family is from a remote village in Vietnam where they have quite a unique tradition. Apparently the family cuts off the genitals of their defeated enemies and eats them with dinner that very night. The enemy’s devoured genitals bless the winner’s family with great power, fertility and luck.

I was fucked.

Huynh’s father and uncle grab me from behind and drag me over to their side of the court. I kick and scream wildly for help but my mates are too drunk to give a shit and they simply laugh and chug beers. I struggle to free myself but it’s no use, the uncle and father remove my pants and place a rubber band tightly around my cock and balls. I glance over at Trihn for pity and sympathy but she simply stares back at me with a blank expression on her face. I’m nothing but meat for her family’s sick tradition just as she was nothing but meat for my sick fantasies. The father and uncle force me down so hard that I can no longer struggle. As Huynh pulls out the razor blade and places it against my ensnared genitalia, I stare back at Trihn and I smile.

She’ll still be sucking on my balls for dessert tonight.

Virginity and Retribution

It’s 12.14 am.

I’ve been sitting in this armchair for hours on end, waiting for my 17-year-old daughter to come home. After years of sheltering her from late night social activities I finally gave in to the pressure of my nagging wife and let Cindy – our daughter, go to her first teenage party. Cindy is a beautiful, shy girl… and that’s exactly the problem; she’ll be a prime target for horny, drunken highschool boys who will pressure her into drinking and then take advantage of her. The very thought of a bunch of highschool punks touching my sweet little girl sickens me to my stomach. My mind races and strains as the minutes tick by.

1.31 am.

There is a sudden weak knock on the door and I race out to attend it with anticipation and great concern. I open the door and cowering before me is my daughter Cindy… covered in bruises with a plain, blood-soaked bedsheet wrapped over her delicate body. “He… *sniff* He raped me… *sniff sniff*” She whimpered with tears pouring from her eyes.

Jesus Christ…

I give up being an “over-protective father” for one single night and this bullshit happens. I pick Cindy up gently off the porch and bring her inside. She continues crying and shaking as I carry her upstairs into the bathroom. I run her a warm bath and ask her if I can take a look at the damage on her body. She nods slowly and removes the bedsheet revealing her bruise covered skin. I catch a quick glimpse of her young vagina… a nasty flow of blood leaks from it and continues running down her left thigh.

Fuck me. My own flesh and blood defiled like this? My sweet little angel… de-flowered, cherry busted, de-virginized and raped. Not on my fucking watch, some piece of shit WILL pay for what he’s done. Never fucking cross me.

After laying Cindy down in the bath I ask her for a name. “Ryan… H-He did it” She replied. “What is his last name sweety?” I ask. “Summerfeld… Ryan Summerfeld *sniff*” She whimpered. I assure Cindy that everything will be alright before retreating into the bedroom where I boot up my computer. I hear my wife snoring behind me… fucking bitch… this is mostly her fault and now I’m the one who has to clean up this mess. I immediately search for Ryan Summerfeld’s Facebook. My fists clench and a surge of pure hatred rushes through every inch of my body as the page loads up. His profile picture clearly indicates that he’s a typical highschool jock fuckhead. I spot a public message on his page that reads: “FuCk YEAH!! Party 2NITE bitches!!! GOnna fuck the SHIT out of Cindy Myers >:) Shits gonna be SO cash!” Visions race through my head of Ryan Summerfeld raping my crying daughter at some frat party while laughing loudly and high-fiving his bros. I begin pulsating with absolute rage but manage to calm myself down. The stupid little shit left his house address on his Facebook and that’s all I needed.

I help Cindy out of the bath, get her dressed into some clean clothing, put her to bed, kiss her forehead and assure her that everything will be fine because I will sort it all out. After turning off the light and gently closing the door to my daughter’s room I waste no time and head straight to my special closet. It is here where I rendezvous with my three partners in retribution: Mossberg 500, Desert Eagle and Combat Knife.

It’s 3.15 am.

I ring the doorbell 6 times before Mr. Summerfeld opens the door whereas my Mossberg shotgun fires just once before the shot opens his  face. The glorifying combustion of his skull results in the splattering of cranial fluids  and the launching of brain giblets throughout the Summerfeld hallway. I venture inside to chase down a now terrified Mrs. Summerfeld who attempts to flee back upstairs. My Desert Eagle fires three shots at her legs; 2 of these shots hit the same leg causing Mrs. Summerfeld to come crashing back down the stairs. After suffering a bloody leg amputation and a moderate fall I decide to put the woman out her misery. I grip the barrel of the Desert Eagle tightly with one hand, pull her head up by grasping her hair with the other hand and apply five direct pistol whips to her face. I take out my Combat Knife and cut Mrs. Summerfelds clothing off. Her hairy vagina stares back at me in silence; the putrid birthplace of the pathetic little shit that forcefully took my daughters’ virginity… her precious innocence. I begin hacking and stabbing away at Mrs. Summerfelds vagina until it’s nothing more than a horrific, bloodied slurry of snatch. I quickly hang her corpse up on the wall and begin salvaging as much of Mr. Summerfelds facial skin as I can.

5.08 am.

In absolute darkness without sound or movement I remain hidden in the Summerfeld kitchen, waiting for Ryan to return home. I’m wearing Mr. Summerfelds bloodied PJ’s and a mask of his facial skin that I managed to staple back together. Ryan soon stumbles through the front door  with a gigantic “I FUCKED your daughter” smile on his face and switches on the light. I jump out of the kitchen in my authentic Mr. Summerfeld costume and scream at the suddenly confused and terrified boy, “Ryan! You’ve been a HORRIBLE son!” Ryan quivered in extreme horror while catching a glimpse of his fathers severed face resting upon my own. “Da-Daaad……?” Ryan whimpered. “You’ve been such a HORRIBLE son Ryan that your mother and I have both agreed you should of never been BORN!” I continued without even attempting to sound like Mr. Summerfeld. As Ryan struggles for the door I run over and begin beating on him and knocking the pathetic teenage rapist to the ground. “You should have never been BORN my TERRIBLE son! We are going to put you BACK where you came!” I yelled while dragging him towards his mother’s strung-up corpse. Before Ryan could even react I shove his entire head into Mrs. Summerfelds hacked-up, bloodied mess of a snatch and jam the barrel of my Mossberg shotgun up his asshole. The highschool punk continues flailing his limbs in agony as I jam the mighty shotgun further and further up his now bleeding cornhole. After leaving him to choke inside his own mothers hacked up vagina for a while I decide to end his pathetic life by firing the anally inserted shotgun.

The task is finally complete so I retreat outside to admire the radiant sun and get some fresh air. I stab the Summerfeld dog to death and take a shit on its corpse before setting the entire house on fire and walking home to my family.

My daughter will never be harmed again.

Never cross me.

My Housemate Joe

Tues, 12th of May 2009 – Well it’s been a few months now since that bitch divorced me. She took everything from me; my house on the coast, my Swedish furniture suite, my twelve year old daughter, my BMW… even my fucking toucan.

All I have left is a briefcase full of clothes, my computer, my crappy two bedroom apartment and this stupid diary. I found it the other day amongst a box of old Hyper Magazines while cleaning out a closet. I figure that writing down my thoughts might help me deal with all this stress because my daily therapy with doctor Jack Daniels doesn’t seem to be working anymore.

Wed, 14th of May 2009 – I received an email today from a guy who was interested in sharing my apartment, his name was Joe. He explained in the email how he recently left his home in Austria for some personal reasons and needed a place to stay. It sounded like a great idea; I’d be receiving rent payments and a new buddy would do me good. I arranged to meet Joe at the pub tomorrow to get to know him a bit more… just to make sure he’s not fucked in the head or whatever; I don’t want to live with some freak.

Thur, 15th of May 2009 – Today was fucking great. I met Joe at the pub around midday, we had beers and played pool while joking about serious issues like rape and child abuse. Joe has a great sense of humour, he’s just the kind of person I needed around this place. I invited him to move in tomorrow, I’m going to help him move his stuff!

Fri, 16th of May 2009 – My new housemate Joe is all settled in the apartment. He didn’t have a lot of stuff so it only took an hour to help him move in. Afterward, we sat on the balcony and drank some beers. He confessed to me about how much he misses his family back in Austria… particularly his daughter. I told Joe that I have a young daughter myself and that I can totally relate to what he’s feeling.

Sat, 17th of May 2009 – Joe and I spent the whole day building a basement extension to the apartment. He explained to me that he had a basement in his house back in Austria which was very useful. We also bought a box of Krispy Kreme donuts, Joe is full of great ideas!

Sun, 18th of May 2009 – There was a garage sale down the street today. Joe and I picked up this sweet blue couch for really cheap; it was going to replace the Swedish one my ex-wife commandeered… fucking bitch.

While we carried the couch home I spotted a super hot MILF walking with her pre-teen daughter. “I’d like a piece of her ass!” I commented. “I’ll take the daughter”, Joe replied. I laughed so hard I nearly dropped the couch on my head. Hahaha, good one Joe!

Mon, 19th of May 2009 – I came home from work today and found Joe sitting alone on the veranda, drinking a beer and watching a group of young schoolgirls with a pleasant smile on his face. Poor guy must really miss his daughter I guess.

Later that night Joe convinced me that we should never watch the news because it’s full of  media driven bullshit, faceless political nonsense and false ideals which do nothing but promote negativity. I completely agree with him, fuck the news. You’re a really clever guy Joe.

Tues, 20th of May 2009 – I took a ‘sicky’ off work today to keep Joe company; I was worried he was getting depressed about his family while I was gone. We played poker and drank beer all morning, Joe won the last round with a straight flush! Well played Joe.

We spent the afternoon watching the first terminator. There was a knock at our door halfway through the movie and Joe offered to answer it. When I got up after a while to see who it was I saw two young girl scouts screaming and running away. “What was that about Joe?” I asked. “I showed them my cock.” Joe replied. I have never laughed so fucking hard in my life. Joe, you’re a fucking riot!

Wed, 21st of May 2009 – After work I came home to find that Joe had finished building the new basement in our apartment. I have never seen him so happy since he moved in; the basement must really mean a lot to him.

While he was showing me around the new room I noticed a pair of girl scout uniforms crumpled up in the corner. Joe explained to me that he felt bad for pranking the two girl scouts that turned up to our house yesterday so he invited them over to play hide and seek in the new basement. “I guess they accidentally left their clothes here, I’ll make sure I return them to the girls tomorrow”, he told me. Wow Joe, you really are a thoughtful guy.

Thur, 22nd of May 2009 – I had the most terrible sleep last night, I kept waking up to crying and whimpering noises coming from the basement. I thought it might be Joe but sure enough he was asleep in his bed. It didn’t make sense for Joe to be crying anyway he’s the happiest I’ve ever seen him, must of been my stupid imagination.

Work apparently wants me to attend a week long seminar out of state next week. I was worried Joe would get lonely without me but he seems really content with his new basement.

Fri, 23rd of May 2009 – My ex-wife dropped a bomb on me today. Apparently I have to look after my daughter for the entire duration of next week. I would love to see my little girl again but I have that really important seminar to attend out of state for work, It’s like my bitch ex-wife knew I was going and is trying to fuck with me. Well fuck her, Joe can look after my daughter for the week, after all he’s got a daughter of his own back in Austria that he misses a lot so he’ll appreciate the offer. I’ll ask him first thing tomorrow!

Sat, 24th of May 2009 – Joe is such a great dude. Not only did he happily agree to take care of my daughter for all of next week but he’s also made plans for all the things to keep her entertained. My ex-wife tried to catch me out by dumping my daughter on me at a really inappropriate time but I STILL found a way around it. Take that you stupid woman!

Sun, 25th of May 2009 – My plane left the state early this morning and I’m writing this entry in my business class hotel room. I don’t even think I need to write in this stupid diary anymore; I’m perfectly happy with life right now and I’ve always felt that writing in a diary was kind of gay.

I spoke to my little girl on the phone today, she had arrived at my house and had already met Joe. She was telling me that she was about to play hide and seek in the new basement with Joe. Tears of joy dripped from my eyes as I hung up the phone; I could only imagine the fun they would have. You really are a swell guy Joe.

"I smell children!"